i can't.

Not this again.

My favorite picture from yesterday. :)

Money, fame and fortune never could compete.

P.S. guys, I suck at christmas gifts. I don't even know what to get anyone. :/

It's only a half-joke. Sometimes, I wish you knew that.
But most of the time, I'm glad you don't.

You've got me out here in the water so deep.

This week was so encouraging. I know we can't live off of spiritual "highs" and we have to be careful about living a faith by feelings, but times like these are so uplifting.
Our God is healer, awesome in power.

if i wake up tomorrow, will you still be here?

The only thing I miss right now is being understood.

Bestie, I love you.

And I miss this.

I'm happy.

   Do I have problems? Yeah. Does it seem to me like my life sucks sometimes? Yeah. Do I feel blamed for things I shouldn't be blamed for? Yeah. Do I sometimes feel like the one who gets nailed on if I dare to so much as release a tear? Yeah. Am I jealous of some people? Yeah. Do some people/things make me cry sometimes? Yes.
   But I'm happy. I have a great life. I know who my real friends are, and these select few are more than enough. I have a newfound brother figure in Christ visiting, even though he's leaving tomorrow, I know I can call or text him if I need it. There are people who make me laugh, and when I'm laughing, everything gets just that much lighter. I have a best friend (Tom) who rarely texts me, but when he does, it's always at the right time. I have support, even though I thought maybe it was wavering for a minute there, it came back. My sisters give me hope every day. I'm waiting on the Lord for an answer about a really, really great guy. (And thank you, God, it doesn't appear to be moving toward the "no" direction.)
But more importantly, I have joy from Christ.
And that would be why I'm still alive.
So don't call me negative.
With Christ, I will always bounce back.

it gets hard but it won't take away my Love.

College application essays? Biggest lies ever.

Our God will not be moved;

Our God will never be shaken.

Nights are usually the worst times for me. But not tonight.
Tonight, the Lord showed me that He truly is King.
And tonight, I am truly content to be a Princess.

What more do I want?

I've all but begged.

That's it.
I'm not doing that anymore.

I'm going to spend tomorrow with people I love. People who care.
That gives me hope.

Day 9;

Two movies I absolutely love:
1. Singing in the Rain
2. Princess Bride.
If you haven't seen those, or don't like them? Yeah, you're a sinner.

Going to see Rachel tomorrow!

I miss you, lady! Can't wait until you're home to stay. :)

Maybe for you;

There are things I'd like to say to you;

But honestly, I don't know how.

In this world you will have trouble.
But take heart, I have overcome the world.
This is what I'm thankful for.

If it kills me.

Day 8;

Three Favorite Cartoon Characters:
1. Marvin the Martian. Best. Ever.
2. Roger Ramjet
3. Sullivan (Monsters Inc.)

Day 7;

Four songs that describe my life right now:
1. Little Wonders- Rob Thomas.
2. Falling For You- Colbie Calliat
3. Apologize- One Republic
4.No Matter What- Kerrie Roberts

This is what we do when we're supposed to be studying;

I'm texting Rachel. He's being weird.

Perfectly acceptable.

My sisters never fail to remind me just how awesome my life really is.

Day 6;

Five things I can eat every day:
-Chicken Spaghetti. Yum.
-Raspberries.
-Saltine crackers.
-French bread. Gah, so yummy.
-This is not technically eat, but Dr. Pepper. :)

My smile? It's for people like you. People like you who feel like they're falling. People like me. So that when you see who I really am, you'll wonder why my smile is still real.
And I'll tell you, it's still the cross.

Just for the record, I don't believe in fake smiles or happiness either. 

I believe in making them real.

Day 5;

Six of your favorite books:
-The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom
-Bruchko by Bruce Olson.
-Roll Of Thunder Hear My Cry by Mildred D. Taylor
-Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas
-In The Presence of My Enemies by Gracia Burnham
-When God Writes Your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy
<3

Winnerss. :)

Teammates on a scavenger hunt at Disney. 

Man, we were tired.

Ian: "Hey, Lila, you'll like this song, since you're anti-romantic."

And: "I have my Dad's back, and my mom's face... unfortunately."

^^The things this kid says. He's gonna get beaten one day.

My.Life.

Day 4;

Seven people who inspire me and why:
-Mama. She is such a godly woman and a fantastic Mom! I wanna be just like her.
-Aaron. He has taught me so much about the bible and the Lord over the years.
-Jolee. She makes me wanna be just plain awesome.
-Bear. Again, such a godly person in my life convicting and teaching me.
-My sisters. They make me want to lead a good life so I don't teach them to do all the bad things I've done.
(Aaand people I don't know)
-Gianna Jensen. Holy cows, this woman is incredible. Go look her up on youtube.
-Gracia Burnham. Yes, this woman is also amazing. Wrote a book called In the Presence of My Enemies.

Day 3;

Eight places you want to visit:
-China.
-Greece.
-Maryvill TN. (Miss you, Hannah!)
-Guyana.
-Haiti.
-Ireland
-Texas
-Aaand. Hm. Israel. :)

Day 2;

Nine things I can't live without:
-Faith
-My lovely Mommy and Daddy.
-My sisters
-My brother
-People. I would simply waste away if confined to solitary.
-Music
-Sunshine
-Water, duh. No, but for real, I love swimming as much as I love drinking. :P
-I guess I could live without him, but I wouldn't want to have to. :)

I think... I think I got this.

With you by my side I will fight and defend.

You're not alone, together we stand.
Keep holding on.

I want this to be my one consuming passion.

I can't do this.

Why did I ever think taking four semester classes and one quarter class was a good idea?
I have no idea what I'm doing in half of my classes. Mom's not here to help me.
I'm so stressed and frustrated, even the medicine isn't helping.
I would love to quit right now.

realizing that you have no idea how to do something is one of the most depressing things in the world.

oh, that just made my day.
not.

if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Day 1;

Ten things I wanted to/wanna be when I grow up:
Want currently:
1. Mommy
2. Wife (actually, probably this one first. :P)
3. Speaker
4. Writer
5. Anything else pertaining to a family. :)
Wanted:
6. Police officer
7. Medic
8. Nurse
9. Lifeguard (hey, I did that one!)
10. EMT
Dang, that was actually really hard.
I just noticed that I really, really wanted to go into medical until I realized how much math and science there is. :/

Challenge? Yes. :)

Day 1: Ten Things You Wanted/Want To Be When You’re Older

Day 2: Nine Things You Can’t Live Without

Day 3: Eight Places You Want To Visit

Day 4: Seven People Who Inspire You, and Why?

Day 5: Six of Your Favorite Books

Day 6: Five Things You Can Eat Everyday

Day 7: Four Songs That Describe Your Life Right Now

Day 8: Three favorite Cartoon Characters

Day 9: Two Movies You Absolutely Love

Day 10: One Quote That Describes Your Life Right Now 

You can't really see how crazy it is, buuut this is my hair with no work done.

This would be why I often fry it at 350 degrees. :P

I hate it when people say no one cares.

Not that I never say that.

But, I promise, someone cares.

I happen to be one of these someones.

Someone cares. <3

I am so flawed.

Scars all up in there. I used to hate all of me.
But you changed my mind.
I like my flaws.

My mind goes;

"you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. you. You."
And I gotta go, "stop that, mind. Think about something else."
:)

It's like nobody realizes that mental scars can be deeper than physical ones.
2 Corinthians 12:9

Secret #23;

I love all the little things. <3

College applications.

Kill me now.

I. Am. Golden.

I just need to believe it.

Little brother, you changed so much about me;

And all of it for the better.

Let me help you now?

You say you know.

But I don't really think you do.

I'm just another number to you.

I don't think my teacher realizes how hard it is to find recent motivational speeches.
Really.

Lila: "I'm gonna call my husband baby. I don't think he'll like it, but I still am."
Me: "Imma call mine that, and he's gonna like it!"

We're silly. :)

Can't find my kitty cat. :(

I'm just hanging on.

I love them.

I'm so easy to blame.

Holy cows, I have a lot of why, what's ups to do. I'm going to bed.

I got around to cleaning two bathrooms, the kitchen, the living room, the downstairs... but not my own room. Wow.

House, why is there so much of you to clean? :(

Dang.

Missed 11:11

This? So hard.

I'm going home, back to the place where I belong;

Where your love have always been enough for me. <3

Secret #22;

I know you're trying to help;

But honestly, this is good for me. It's teaching me faithfulness, trust, and prayer. It gives me something to hope for when it seems like everything else isn't worth it. It gives me a reason to smile, even on the worst days ever. It's teaching me to lay what I want at the feet of Jesus and allow him to do his work.


Please don't discourage me.

"Unconfidence" is contagious.

Be confidence.
It's also contagious.

Thank God one person notices.

There are so many people I'd like to say this too;

So hey you;

Secret #21;

Stress? You might say that.

I hate how I break down over the slightest little thing. 
Math is not something to cry over.
Neither is science.
Neither is not being able to put your seatbelt on.

Your laugh?

Best sound ever.

Secret #20;

People like you are hard to find. <3

They say there's a place where dreams have all gone;

They never said where, but I think I know.

Why does my last semester at this school have to be such a pain?

How will I ever be enough?

Laughter, that's so part of her;

It's something we haven't heard, in such a long time.

My God knows me when no one else does. Amazing. <3

Human Bio next semester with two of my favorite people in the world. :)

Woo hoo!

Home from work!
No more work until Friday?
Boo. :(

Some people thought I wouldn't wait as long as I have;

Sillies. They should see the way I still look at you.

Whatevvs;

Today was too nice to worry about that.

I hate it when he says something that makes him mad and I don't know what to do because I'm in the middle of it, and honestly all I want is to not fight and be cool with both of them. Not that I'm trying bs my way through anything, I really do want to get along with both of them, preferably at the same time.
Gah, being a peacekeeper? Yeah, overrated. From a human standpoint, anyway.

Fine.

It's chilly;

But who cares? Good day with some of my favorites. :)

Can't sleep. I hate it when this happens.

Something I realized;

When someone's unhappy, they can't stand to see other people happy.
Nor can they stand to see other people unhappy.
Not because they understand, but because they think no one's problems can be as big as theirs.


When someone's happy, they enjoy having other happy people around.
They can also care for the not-so-happy people because being happy makes them more compassionate.
In short, happy people are encouraging.


So be happy. :)

Christ is my smile.

Someone has too much time on their hands;

Nooooo!

My Chill Pill;

You? Best thing ever. :)

My Life is Average
Love Gives Me Hope
Gives Me Hope
Six Billion Secrets
Best websites ever? Yes. :)

You give me hope. Every single day.

At school, waiting for mama to pick me up :)

Very happy.

Very much at peace.

Very ready to be this way for eternity.

Meeting you?

Probably the single most amazing thing that ever happened to me.

Ever.

Dear Eminem;

I love you. <3

Pour it all over!

Hey boo :)

Every time I get this text, I smile.
I miss you, Rae. Come home. 

I hate science;

Makes me feel like an idiot.
I'm not.
But it sure makes me feel like one.

Maybe you never know;

I am a Princess on my way to my throne.

Okay, I'm calm;

You win, Lord.

When you come home;

No matter how far, 

run through the door and into my arms

It's where you are loved, it's where you belong

And I will be here, when you come home.

All this;

I need that one best friend who knows everything. 'Cause all this. It's hard.
I feel like saying this is wrong when I have Jesus.
But honestly, and after a talk with someone I consider a spiritual leader, I was made to fellowship with other human beings.
That's why I don't go live by myself in the mountains.
God made me this way.
It's not wrong.
But it is hard.
Especially when they're best friends, and I know I'll never be as close to them as we were.
Especially when some people don't need this.
Especially when I need criticism and also help.
Especially when it's times like now.
When I feel like it's wrong to say this.


What do I do?

Back? Yes, you're killing me. You can stop that now.

I want to be with you;

But you're not here.

I can pretend.

But nothing's as good as the real thing.

I miss you.

Wow, I just love it when people twist my words. :/

I just want to get better.

Enough sickness.

And if you knew;

how I've wanted someone to come along, and change my life the way you've done.

I need you, Jesus;

Come to my rescue
Where else can I go?
No other name by which I am saved
Capture me with grace
I will follow You.

It's November already?

You gotta be kidding me. Only 7 weeks of school left. <3

I miss my best friend.

I need this back right now.

I want my car!

But it looks like it's RIP to loser, silver bullet, Buster, the love of my life.
Whatever you call him. :/